DUMB AND DUMBERER. When Harry Met Lloyd. Based on characters created by. Bobby Farrelly & Peter Farrelly. & Bennet Yellin. Screenplay by. Read, review and discuss the entire Dumb & Dumber movie script by Unknown on Writer: Peter and Bobby Farrelly and Bennett Yellin Starring: Jim Carrey as Lloyd Jeff Daniels as Harry Lauren Holly as Mary Swanson. Grade: A-. “Dumb and.

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Could you tell me how to get to the medical school? I’m supposed to be doing a lecture in about 20 minutes, and my driver’s a bit lost. You go straight ahead, and, uh, you make a left over the bridge. That’s a lovely accent you have. Let’s put another shrimp on the barbie. Boom shack-a-lak-a, what the people want Women them a flex and the men them a chant ‘Ca’ the ’60s style, it have fe come back Draw fe bell-bottom, block heel and frock Boom shak-a-lak, rude boy Here when we tell them now, sir Wine your body, wriggle your belly Dip and go down-ee in the new stylee Wine and go up, wine and go down Bubble and a rocka to the new style around You fe line it up, you fe wine it up Do the Boom shak-a-lak till the dance hall fill up I say the Boom shack-a-lak are screenpla brand new style Wicked say it wicked, jah jah, no say it wild Ragamuffin style fe the discipline child Dip and screenplaj downa ‘ca’it well versatile You fe move fe your waist, move fe your back Wine and go down, do the shack-a-lak-a-lak Get in a groove ‘ca’you are the top notch Bubble screenplau a wine gal right ‘pon the spot.

Now, who’s got the wiener schnitzel? There you go, Dolf. There you go, buddy. Next, we got roast beef au jus. Who’s got the roast beef au jus? Last but screejplay least Who’s got the foot-long? Harry, why haven’t you dropped those dogs off at the show yet? Uh, sir, I didn’t want to send them to a performance on an empty stomach, sir. I’ll be out in one minute. Why are you going to dumner airport? I saw your dmber.

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Then when I noticed the airline ticket, I put two and two together. So where’re you headed?

Name’s Christmas, Lloyd Christmas. This isn’t my real job, you know. That’s what we’re going to call it We’re going to specialize in selling worm farms, you know, like ant farms. A little tense about the flight?

There’s really nothing to worry about, Mary. Statistically, they say you’re more likely to get killed on the way to the airport, you know, like in a head-on crash or flying off a cliff or getting trapped under a gas truck I have this cousin Lloyd, could you keep your eyes on the road, please? Can’t be too careful.

A lot of dubmer drivers out there. Okay, gang, you know the rules Where have you been? My dogs were supposed to be here 40 minutes ago! Now I hardly have any time to primp them. Don’t worry about a thing, Mrs. These pooches aren’t going to need any primping. I’ll tell you why. Because I bathed them and I clipped them myself. And I stand by my performance. You know, on second thought, you might just want to run a comb through ’em.

The white zone is for the immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. I couldn’t possibly accept that, not after all we’ve been through. How about a hug? Dan Mitchell, please pick up the white courtesy phone. Dan Mitchell, please pick up the white screennplay phone She’s gonna leave the briefcase near the escalator.

Passenger Maura Tadge, please pick up the white screenplaj phone. You have a message. Move it or lose it, sister! Sir, you can’t go in there! I’m a limo driver! Fell off the jetway again. Who the hell you figure this guy’s working for, anyway? We sure as hell better find out. They always freak out when you leave the scene of an accident, you know?

Dumb and Dumber (1994)

Yeah, well, I lost my job too. You xnd one pathetic loser. You know what really chaffs my ass, though? I spent my life’s savings turning my van into a dog. The alarm alone cost me It’s a shaggin’ wagon. What’s with the briefcase? It’s a love memento.

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15 Brilliant Facts About Dumb and Dumber | Mental Floss

The most beautiful woman alive, I drove her to the airport. Sparks flew, emotions ran high. She actually talked to me, man.

Sucked me right in. She left this in the udmber and flew to Aspen and out of my life. I would have to be a lowlife to go rootin’ around in somebody else’s private property.

There’s two of them. One of them’s got a gun. Did you pay the gas bill? Do you realize what you’ve done? I say we bail. They must have taken it with them. Well, he’s got to come home sometime. Maybe we should trash the place, send him a little message. I don’t think he’s going to get that message, Joe. I mean, the guy’s got worms in his living room. Oh, I got a better idea. There is nothing, nada, zip! Yeah, unless you want to work 40 hours a week. I’m going to go to the store. Okay, just get the bare essentials.

This is the last of our dough. What do I look like? Take a little walk to the edge of town Go across the tracks Where the viaduct looms Like a bird of doom As it shifts and cracks Where secrets lie in the border fires In the humming wires Hey, man, you know you’re never coming back Past the square, past the bridge Past the mills, past the stack On a gathering storm Comes a tall handsome man In a dusty black coat with a red right hand.

Excuse me, little old lady. Uh, dujber you have change for a dollar?

I guess they’re right. Senior citizens, although slow and dangerous behind the wheel, can still serve a purpose.

I’ll be right back. Don’t you go dying on me! I got robbed by a sweet old lady on a motorized cart. I didn’t even see it coming.